unmarried. a blog
"Tell the truth about what it's like to be human."
- Cheryl Strayed
Surrender isn't giving up, it's giving over.
Read that quote again.
Let it sink in.
Then, after about three more times, read this:
"It isn't about letting go of all of your options or giving up your dreams, but rather giving over your agenda, your timeline, your control, to the presence of the Universe."
My agenda. Ah, yes. The very timeline that runs my life day in and day out. Sometimes to positive effects, oftentimes to a self-created misery.
When experiencing a divorce (which is the slowest break up humanly possible even when both parties are amicable), all of your next steps resemble that of getting on a treadmill only to find that the forward-moving button is broken.
So, as you stand there, you try to remedy the situation, maybe pushing the button several more times, but the pace you want just isn't happening. And, if you're like me, this is where you *might* resort to smashing down on the button with every effort to get moving.
With divorce, this looks like me patiently waiting for calls, emails, smoke signals from lawyers. With selling a house, this looks like me frantically cleaning the house for showings and waiting, again patiently, for calls, emails, smoke signals from real estate agents. With buying a house, this requires all the necessary paperwork that's contingent on all of the above.
AND I HAVE NO CONTROL.
Then this quote pops into my life and the synchronicity is uncanny.
I must surrender the agenda, the timeline, the control. Because, really, this entire process involves many moving parts that are simply out of my jurisdiction.
So I'm giving the situation over to the Universe. Let the process play out the way it has to. As much as it's driving me bat shit crazy, I know it's my only option.
In the meantime, focusing on other important things (there's always a laundry list of something that needs tending to) will be the focus.
It's not giving up.
It's giving it over.